After spending so much time on the photo session it was natural that we felt anxious over the outcome. We headed to 'Blissful' again the following day to have a look at the outcome as well as to select the 20 photos for the album. It was a difficult task.

The photos turned out to be not too bad but we did not look perfect all the time. I was not fully pleased with the outdoor shots. I firmly believe that the photos could have been better if Chris and Ah Khoon had done more. Perhaps outdoor photo shoot is just not Ah Khoon's cup of tea as the studio shots looked so much better than the outdoor shots. I liked a few shots but sadly we could not have all the shots we really liked as we could only choose 20 pictures and we had to fulfill certain criteria. It was really painful to press the delete button sometimes but I guess we had to do it or else we would have to pay more.

So......our photo shoot is settled. Now we have to wait for the final outcome. Meanwhile, it's time to worry about the other matters, to continue planning for the wedding.

It has been a wet week. I had almost given up hope that there was going to be any sunshine on Saturday. I was however wrong. God was kind enough to actually give us some sunshine, enough for us to have a few outdoor photo shots.

Leslie and I arrived at 'Blissful' at 9am. We were the first to reach. In fact, the bridal house was not yet even open. Mei Ling the make up artist greeted us and briefed us about the whole process of the photo shoot. We had a little discussion prior to that so that she would understand our style and liking. After the discussion, we were brought to the make up room where we were transformed. I actually did not really like what I saw but I believed Mei Ling knew best on what was suitable for me and at 10.30 a.m, the first setback took place when Mei Ling brought in a gown for me to change into. My gown which was the first out of five was not altered as promised and it did not fit me perfectly. The tailor had to make last minute modification on my dress and obviously, the last minute work on the gown was not perfect.

Nevertheless, we left for Botanical Gardens at 11 a.m for the first photo shoot. We had requested to have our photos taken by the beach but Ah Khoon our photographer said that the beach was not the best place due to the weather, the sky was not blue enough for a nice scenery. It was probably a blessing in disguise as Ah Khoon brought us to the seaside after that. Therefore we had more variety for our outdoor background instead of only one as stated in our package.

We knew that photo sessions would be taxing but we never expected it to be so time consuming. At 1pm, we were only done with our first gown and we had four more to go. I got my second shock at 1 p.m too. The second gown that Mei Ling brought in was not what I chose! I began to feel slightly irritated. How could they make such a big mistake? It was ridiculous for a professional bridal shop to make such a blunder. Fortunately, Mei Ling was quick in finding a solution. Damage was already done yet the make up artist and the photographer did their best to make the best out of what was lacking.

The photo session finally ended at 7p.m. We were exhausted but happy despite the setbacks. Thanks to Ah Khoon the photographer, Chris and Mei Ling the make up artists, I would say we did enjoy ourselves. There were lots of laughter together with a lot of first time experiences. During the photo shoot, I was bitten by ants and Leslie stepped on my fingers, I screamed in pain and and had tears rolling down my cheeks thanks to those fake eyelashes yet I would say it was an enjoyable experience and I have to admit that the session brought both Leslie and myself even closer. I had never looked into his eyes so many times in my whole entire life!

If one can afford it, I think the bridal photo shoot is definitely worth the experience. We actually opted for the cheaper package with only one album and I think that is good enough. Bridal photo shoots should be fun and exciting. I feel it should not be overly done to the extend of tiring oneself.

I have lost a piece of document which is very important. I cannot imagine if it fell into the wrong hands. The damage will not be 'that' bad but it would not be nice for others to see as the content is confidential. I'm disturbed that I can't find it and my emotion is printed on my face. I don't look happy but what can I do? I do not know where to search anymore. I've gone through all the possible places.....sigh...is all I can say.

I felt exhausted today. It was a feeling of being 'fed up'. I felt angry yet I knew that I should not be. Those who attended the classes were good students and I should not reveal my unhappiness to them after all they did nothing to make me unhappy. It would unfair for me to be emotional just because I was upset with those who were often absent and failed to submit their assignments.

I am trying to control my temper. It is indeed a challenge. Sometimes I ask myself why should I allow those students to affect me when there are so many students out there whom I should pay attention to. Perhaps I'm doing it wrong.

I spent today with mum. I picked her up from the nursing home early in the morning and we left for mass. It was just the two of us because dad vomitted and it was better for him to remain home. It was actually my first time attending mass with mommy alone. It actually felt nice though it was a little bit troublesome as mum was a little slow in her movements as she is learning to walk again after being sick for so long.

We went home and I prepared lunch while both mum and dad waited to be served. Mum was glad to be home. She had looked forward to this day ever since I suggested to her that we should go to mass together last Wednesday. She disliked the nursing home but we had no choice as I had to work while dad had already gotten Sokha's hands full and she was not capable of caring for two old folks alone at home. Mum has been counting the days for her two months stay at the nursing home to end. She craves for home and I try my best to bring her home whenever I'm not working. So I guess today was indeed a rewarding day for mum and I'm glad to have made her happy.

Ever since I moved home, I feel as though my bonding with my mother has strengthened. I tend to think of her more often and as well as wonder about her feelings and thoughts. I cannot detect what changed my feelings towards my mom but I'm glad it is happening.

I used to envy friends who did not have to care for their parents and were able live their dreams and do whatever they wanted because they did not have such responsibilities. However, i feel differently now. I do still feel frustrated at times that I have to consider about my parent's needs each time I plan to make a major decision but at the same time, I am also grateful that I still have them in my life, to be able to be still experience their presence and company. To watch them grow old and care for them. It is not easy but I thank God for the opportunity.

I had been having pain on my fingers and feet for a few months already. Last month, I told the doctor at GH about it and she said if I continued to have fever with the pain, I should go to the hospital and get a check up because it could be a sign of arthritis. That got me worried because I know how is it like for one to have arthritis and I really do not want to have it before I even turn 30. Thank goodness, the fever left, however the pain of both my fingers and feet remained. Today, I went to the Chinese Physician, curious to know what he had to say. He read my pulse and told me that I am rather weak.

You have not been sleeping enough -I guess so
You are always sleepy during the day - very true
You eyes are dull - true, I've always wondered if it was because I did not use any eye care product
Have you been walking too much? -Yes I do walk, in fact I stand a lot because I teach but then again, why is it that my fingers ache too?
Ah so, your occupation contributes to the aches, you write and stand, that is why.

Honestly, I was satisfied with his reasoning. It was very logical.

I am going to give you some herbs, can you boil them using the clay pot? I prefer you to use that method. I will also add in some herbs to help you sleep better. Don't worry, it's not like those 'sleeping pills' you don't have insomnia, you just need more rest and there's too much 'wind' (toxic I assume) in your body.

So what's your name? (He wanted to fill in my details on the computer) -Jennifer Vaz
How is that written in Mandarin? -So I wrote it for him
Ah? I did not know there's such a surname, which part of China are your ancestors from? - Oh, I'm not Chinese.
So sorry, you are easily one, you seem so Chinese. -thank you, I'll take that as a compliment.

So that was my visit to the 'Sin Seh' It was pleasant and I hope he was right in all that he said. It's been ages since I felt revitalized. I really miss that feeling.